Your essays are always thought-provoking! I"m only on my first cup of coffee, but I wonder if what you're describing might involve the difference between sympathy and empathy --- like maybe empathy + vigilance ~=~sympathy? Where sympathy usually prompts someone to offer solutions, rather than just be with the person's feelings. I don't know. This is not strong coffee. But this also reminded me of a quick story: When I was 4, my older sister was very sick in the hospital. The neighbor girls and I made "get well" cards for her, except that mine simply read, "Please don't die." Selfishness or vigilant love? Unfiltered fear from a 4-year-old? I don't think she ever got the cards; she was in ICU. But the older neighbor kids had already told me it wasn't a nice card. (She eventually was fine, I'm thankful to report.) Anyway, thanks for the food for thought.
Maybe I have that backwards. Maybe it's sympathy+vigilance= empathy? Maybe I should not try to math before noon. Maybe I should not math about complicated emotional issues at all-- who am ?!. Someday I want to hear your solo. ;)
It's funny that you're going there because I kept including, then removing, this kind of logic myself ... I wanted to slip in a paragraph or two that helped explain it, map it, diagram it big-picture, and then I kept editing them out. As if I needed to do the thinking but then let it go.
Love the story about your card. :) Kids can be so empathetic and then ... totally not get it. Ha.
OK, what about this: Is sympathy getting short-shrift as empathy is lauded in recent psych culture? Sympathy may actually have some built-in boundaries, where empathy is sometimes prone to lose them. ...
Your essays are always thought-provoking! I"m only on my first cup of coffee, but I wonder if what you're describing might involve the difference between sympathy and empathy --- like maybe empathy + vigilance ~=~sympathy? Where sympathy usually prompts someone to offer solutions, rather than just be with the person's feelings. I don't know. This is not strong coffee. But this also reminded me of a quick story: When I was 4, my older sister was very sick in the hospital. The neighbor girls and I made "get well" cards for her, except that mine simply read, "Please don't die." Selfishness or vigilant love? Unfiltered fear from a 4-year-old? I don't think she ever got the cards; she was in ICU. But the older neighbor kids had already told me it wasn't a nice card. (She eventually was fine, I'm thankful to report.) Anyway, thanks for the food for thought.
Maybe I have that backwards. Maybe it's sympathy+vigilance= empathy? Maybe I should not try to math before noon. Maybe I should not math about complicated emotional issues at all-- who am ?!. Someday I want to hear your solo. ;)
It's funny that you're going there because I kept including, then removing, this kind of logic myself ... I wanted to slip in a paragraph or two that helped explain it, map it, diagram it big-picture, and then I kept editing them out. As if I needed to do the thinking but then let it go.
Love the story about your card. :) Kids can be so empathetic and then ... totally not get it. Ha.
OK, what about this: Is sympathy getting short-shrift as empathy is lauded in recent psych culture? Sympathy may actually have some built-in boundaries, where empathy is sometimes prone to lose them. ...